Our cook Tasneed is a 44-year-old Muslim lady, been working for us for over 10 years and with my parents for over 20 years. She is fair, 5’ 2’ squat figure. Wide hips, 26 breasts. Has three c***dren, two married and is already a grandmother. To us, she was a gentle soul.Husband is a typical chauvinist, very restrictive, checks her phone etc. As our family has looked after them for years, I was trusted!Lately, she had gone extreme in her cooking – too much spice, food served too hot. Boy, she was also in full form, you could here her killing mosquitos which the electric bat with full vigour, totally unlike her sweet nature. This behaviour carried on, I did overhear her talking about how she hated her husband, but tradition meant, she was stuck with him.It all happened on a hot day, I was at home working in the study in a T shirt and shorts. I could hear her banging plates, slamming doors etc. It got a bit too much.The other servant had gone. (Translated from Hindi)“What’s going on? Why. I am sorry. It is just that when you touch me, I do not wish to control myself. My entire life has been that of me controlling my wants and desires. Ever since the death of my papa, I held back from those around me, remaining both untouched and unloved. I listened and watched as everyone lived around me. I have hidden behind a mask, pretending that I did not want the same things other women wanted, but I do want them. Actually, I want you, Erik! My body aches with its need of you. When you place your hands on me, I burn deep inside. You are not the only one that feels tormented, mon amour. I may be untouched, but I am not wholly innocent. I am aware of the things that men and women do. One cannot live on an estate the size of the de Mornay's without witnessing several assignations. I realize that I must learn control or I could hurt someone, perhaps, even kill someone. If one good thing can come of Helen's mistake, it is to show me what comes from not being properly prepared. I want.
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