In the back of my mind I still knew I wanted to fuck a man. It reached a boiling point one summer night while out partying with friends. At the end of the night drunk and high my friends dropped me at my jeep. I was staying at my grandmothers who let me come and go as I pleased so a thought came to mind as I climbed in. There was one gay bar in my town called The Shamrock. It was a skeezy little place everyone knew about but it was in a rough part of town. I decided since I was now an adult I would try my luck. I was not far and pulled to the backside of the rundown building so my jeep wasn't seen from the main road. I nervously locked up and jogged to the front. I opened the door greeted by a big blond haired guy in a leather jacket smirking at me. He asked for ID while I fumbled with my wallet. With X's marking my hands I moved in eyeing the bar. I had been drinking and smoking weed with my friends so I did not need anymore drinks to get me over my fears. I had made it over the. It raised me up so I could seemy reflection. I almost cried at what I saw, there was nothingparticularly feminine about myself, but nothing very masculine either. Iwas pale, my cheeks were sunken, I was nothing but skin and bones. Myhair was short, I had practically no eyebrows."Jesus, I look like I've never eaten a bite or moved a muscle," I saidmournfully."For all intents and purposes you haven't," said Wanda. "You spent thebetter part of nineteen years in a tube, and have been on that bedeating nothing but paste for the last couple of weeks."Jean came around and unzipped my gown. I broke down when I saw it. I hadonce been a strong, virile, young man, a football player and MVP, butnow I was a skinny, shapeless form. I looked like a starved ten year oldboy, except for the obvious lack of boyhood. "Oh my... *sniff* ...G-go... Waaahhhhh! ...Huugggg...Ahhh," I had never cried like that before,but then again I'd never had so much reason to. My whole life, includingmy body, had been.
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