'It was too late; there was no taking back what he had said, and theyboth knew it. "Kind of messed up, right?" he murmured."It wasn't what I was expecting." So you hate me, right?"Kathleen stared her son directly in the eye. "No, I don't hate you. Idon't hate you in the least bit. But it's a very big thing that you justsaid, something that we are going to need to work through and figureout." I didn't want to be a girl, really I didn't, but I couldn't help it." It'll be okay. We will figure it out." I just feel like people will be mad, like I let them down orsomething."Kathleen nodded. There was a good possibility that some people would notbe pleased, but that was too heavy a burden to place on her son's smallshoulders. "In life, you learn to live out the truth and say to heckwith what other people think. We will figure this out together and we'llmove on from there."That seemed to satisfy Jessie for the moment. After subsequentconversations, he started therapy, and the psychologist. I couldnt move anyway, each limb was restricted and the Velcro was like an industrial strength I remember trying to get out of it one time when Ted thought it would be funny to ignore my mercy pleas as he tickled me with a feather on my rib cage. I had thrust around violently trying to distract him as I worked on the Velcro, but it wouldnt give, not even a little. Ted had only held out a few seconds that time, I feared I would be calling out mercy tonight again, but that it would be falling on deaf ears. I lay there, like a rag doll as Steven chewed on my nipples, making sure to move his mouth over to my right breast to even the pain out for me. I cried out a little whimper each time he closed his teeth down hard, it seemed to energise him and I hated that, but I couldnt keep silent throughout the ordeal. He stopped for a moment, looked me in the eyes and said, So what do we have under here? and pulled the doona cover off me completely. The small amount of light from outside, cast.
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