For a long time, no one spoke a word. It was Liz who first broke the silence."You will die," she said to me, and smiled."I know," I said.She thought that I had not understood her. "You will die now, on this trip," she said."Yes, I know," I said."Since when do you know?" she asked, trying to keep her surprise from showing in her voice."Since before I agreed to join the expedition," I said."But how did you know?"I looked at Paul who sat next to us, pretending not to be interested in our talk. Or maybe he really wasn't."Paul has never had any secrets from me." No, I could not say that. He had not told her that he had told me. He had not been open to her, and I could not brag that he had always been open with me, even after we had broken up."I read it in his eyes, when he asked me to join," I said."And you joined?" Liz said, surprised."He wanted me to," I said. His engagement present for her. The proof that he loved her more than me. In her eyes, at least, it would be the proof. It was. " In those few words dad had used my name, Janet, for the first time, he had said he would help me, and then told me he loved me. Oh, he didn't actually say it, but it was there, just under the surface, in between the words. I hugged him, then left a lipstick print on his cheek. "Thanks dad." "Have fun tonight." Beth walked down the stairs, and I have to say, she did not look 14. Her dress, like mine, was short, but unlike mine, which had a square cut neckline, hers was round neck. She had to have padded her bra, but her legs were great and her hair was done in a braid, her makeup flawless. "You girls have a nice time, and if there's any trouble at all, come straight home." Beth and I left the house at seven and walked the three house down to Kelly's, and was admitted by her mother. "Beth! And who is this?" "This is my sister Janet." "Nice to meet you Janet. The party is on the patio, so you girls go on back." Now, she knew that Beth had no sister, so the only thing I could do was.
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