She rested her head against the door, one hand pressed up against it, knowing he was on the other side, somewhere. She’d gotten up on numb, shaking limbs, and tendered her resignation within minutes. She lied and claimed there had been a death in her family. Since she was obviously in such distress, and inconsolable, she gathered her things to respectful silence, and was gone. He hadn’t attempted to contact her. He’d assumed his confession had disgusted her and she’d fled. Just one more wrong turn. He’d asked for silence and he’d gotten it. If she’d answered at all…just one word, he’d have heard it in her voice. She knew. Knew how much she was in love with him, thought she could bear it herself since he had seemed so remote. But with his words echoing in her head every day since, she’d left her job, left her husband, left her life. There was only him. And he was gone. And she wasn’t worthy of him. What could she have to offer him? Terror? She’d made a mess of her life in five. There appeared to be a new resolve about her as if she had come to some decision and was gladdened by it. With one hand on the railing beside her, and the other hanging non-chalantly beside her grey skirt, she managed to catch my eye and unobtrusively moved two fingers of her hanging hand to indicate that I should again move to her, rather than she to me. As the train moved through it's first series of stops, this is exactly what I did until we were once again standing with her hidden by my jacket and her back against the wall.No sooner were we in position, with her obscured from view, then she unbuttoned her vest tucking the flaps behind her and against the wall. Her hands moved then to her left side and the hooks securing her skirt, releasing them, unzipping the skirt she let the waistband fall free, it's position now held only by the pressure of her buttocks against the wall behind her. As the front of the waistband sagged down, it revealed a black lace garter belt and matching.
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