One evening Lakshmi said to her, 'Mem sahib, if you don't mind, may I say something?''Sure, why not?' Anita replied breezily. She was wearing a short T shirt that highlighted her pierced belly button and a pair of shorts. She was looking so young and attractive that it was difficult to say that she was a married woman.'Mem Sahib. I had a very strange but erotic dream. Should I tell you what it was?''Of course. A dream is a dream. Why should I mind?' Anita replied.'Mem Sahib, I asked you because you were in it but Sahib was not.''What difference does it make? Come on, now. Tell me.' Anita was curious now. 'I dreamt that this birthmark of yours was not there on your thigh. In fact you went to get it tattooed. And when you reached the shop, he asked you to strip. That is natural and you stripped. But instead of tattooing it, he took you to a room where a man was lying. The man asked you to sit on top of the man, so that when the lovemaking would start, he would tattoo you.' Lakshmi. It didn’t matter that he fed me the drugs. I took them willingly. It didn’t matter that it happened several more times. All that mattered was that I surrendered my young virtue and sacrificed my integrity as a result. I think from that point on I lived for the sole purpose of rebellion. That didn’t mean I capitulated education and advancement, not at all. I excelled in academia and I understood what it would bring down the road, even at that young age. Rebellion for me was indulging in pot and ecstasy, staying out all night at the concerts and having sex whenever I felt the urge. I didn’t just hit it with anybody. I like to think of it as selective promiscuity. None of the crowd I hung with were part of the Latino or black culture or even hip hop. We were rich stoners. The Bay Area jammers and Dead remnants were it for us. That was a constant until I graduated from high school and my parents picked up the tab for Stanford. I still kept my Bay Area music affections but the drugs.
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