It just lays more demands on me. But that is school-smart; it isn’t smart.”“Maybe. That is something to talk about on our next visit.”“Have you had the dream in the past week?”“Yes. Aren’t we going to talk about being smart?”“You are an intelligent girl. That helps you a great deal in understanding books. It can help you to understand yourself, but you have to work at it.”“It doesn’t help others understand me.”“No. What we are seldom helps how others behave. What we can handle is how we behave.”“I don’t see how understanding myself will help with how my teachers treat me.”“Maybe not. It does help with how you treat yourself. And, after all, your English teacher has you in her power for five hours a week; she’s worrying about a score of other students in that time. You are inside your skin 168 hours a week and pay attention to yourself most for almost every one of those hours. Besides, if you understand yourself, you may start understanding the behaviors that the teachers respond. Thus, somewhat past dawn the next day, I told them I would speak with them both. Amid the purple morning mists, we sat round the campfire for a stretched silence, aught but its occasional crackle and the rustle of the nearby river to intrude upon the uncomfortable quietude. “I am a werewolf,” I finally admitted, although I did not suppose it came as any great shock. Vilja, holding herself stiffly, began to sob, eyes downcast at her boots shuffling nervously in the brown grass. Lydia regarded me warily. “I… I do not know what more to say,” I added lamely. “But, w-why?” Vilja cried. “H-How did this happen?” “I… did it myself.” “But… why?” the blonde repeated. “Why would you do something like this – become a… a m-monster?” “‘Monster’?” I countered sharply. “See you a monster before you now?” “Well, not now, no. But—” “I am stronger, faster… I can stay up and… run all night. I… I feel more alive, like I can do anything.” “Anything but sleep and eat like a normal person,” Vilja.
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