This is not funny and I am very unhappy.Sincerely,Violet DAY EIGHT:O.K. Pal ! !WHAT IN THE SCREAMING HELL AM I GOING TO DOWITH EIGHT MAIDS-A-MILKING?JESUS!!!I THINK I PREFER THE GODDAMN BIRDS!THE GODDAMN MAIDS-A-MILKING HAD TO BRING THEIR GODDAMN COWS.THERE IS COW SHIT ALL OVER MY LAWN AND BIRD SHIT ALL OVER THE HOUSE.I CANNOT MOVE MY FEET.JUST LEAVE ME THE HELL ALONE,SMARTASS.DAY NINELISTEN SHITHEAD ! !YOU'RE A SADISTIC BASTARD!NOW I HAVE NINE PIPERS PIPING IN MY FRONT YARDAND THEY ARE STANDING KNEE DEEP IN COW SHIT.THIS AFTER CHASING THOSE MAIDS ALL NIGHT LONG. CONSEQUENTLY,UPSETTING THE COWS TO THE POINT THAT THEY ARE STEPPING ALL OVERTHOSE GODDAMN SCREECHING BIRDS.THE NEIGHBORS HAVE STARTED A PETITION TO EVICT ME.UP YOURS ! ! ! DAY TENYOU ROTTEN PRICK ! ! !NOW THERE'S TEN LADIES DANCING.I DON'T KNOW WHY I CALL THOSE SLUTS "LADIES".THEY'VE BEEN BALLING THOSE GODDAMN PIPERS ALL NIGHT LONG.NOW THE GODDAMN COWS CAN'T sleep AND THEY'VE GOT DIARRHEA!EVERYTHING HAS TURNED TO A RIVER. I looked inside and sighed. All my bags were still unpacked and tossed on my bed. All of my old posters still hung on the walls, and I finally felt like I was home again. I searched and found my blue swimming trunks, then tugged off my clothes and donned the trunks.Stepping out onto our deck, I spotted Linda relaxing in a beach chair, sunglasses covering her eyes. I once again was stunned by her development. Though I'm not an expert, I swear she was at least a 34B. She now had a thin sweat sheen on her body, causing all the highlights to glint in the sun; her long legs, her cute tummy, and then her chest, which was by far the best I had ever seen on a fifteen-year-old. Her iced tea was set down next to her, and I sneaked up and poured the contents on her stomach."Hey!" she screamed, then saw me laughing as I cannon-balled into the pool. The water felt cool and refreshing. When I came up laughing, I looked at the chair and was surprised to see it was empty, and before I had time to.
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